This entry
reflects my previous 2 visits to the hospice and interaction with the
patients. The hospice visit has now become a part of my routine. Every
week, I look forward to the coming Wednesday on what new learning will
it bring to me. The past 2 visits went by pretty normal. I went up with
Mr. Polite and had a lovely conversation with him. Every week, without
fail, he does not forget to compliment me. There is a new adjective
every week… from beautiful, pretty, wonderful and now radiant. I wonder
what he is going to say next week. The past 2 visits have been very
conversational with him. Initially, a couple of times I have had to
struggle with stuff to talk about. But, the past 2 times, he has been
very conversational. It is good in a way that he is become more and more
responsive. What disturbs me is that he has no sense of his current
situation. He, probably, recollects his past memories and starts
re-living them. For instance, yesterday he was talking about how he and
his wife decided not to sell their house and how he enjoyed playing
tennis with his buddy that he met after a long, long time. He was
imagining that he was sitting in a restaurant in LA and having dinner
with his buddy. He then asked me how my day went and whether I was able
to find a new tennis group. He probably thinks I’m one of his old tennis
friends. At this point, I was in an ethical dilemma whether to tell him
the truth or play along with him. It would break my heart to tell him
that he is a patient and he is at a hospice, not a restaurant. I decided
to just play along with his imaginative stories. I’m pretty confident
that in his young days he must have been a real charmer!
I
was sad to hear that Miss Beautiful Eyes had to be moved to another
hospice for better care. I really started seeing some positive response
from her. There was something about her, about her eyes that made me
want to know more and keep talking to her. I don’t know if I’ll be able
to continue to see her, but I hope she does well.
Meanwhile,
Miss Lovely Smile has been surprising me every time. I am getting used
to seeing such positive response from her. I didn’t get to see her last
week since he was bed-ridden. Yesterday, I went up to her while she was
having dinner. I try to keep it cheerful with her to see her response.
She gave me a huge smile and it radiated to her eyes. That alone was
enough for me! I sat down next to her trying to have a conversation. She
was more response than last time, though I still had to try hard to
hear her talk. To my surprise, not only was she keeping up with the
conversation, she was also engaging in one herself. One of other
patients at the table was shouting and making faces at attract
attention. Instant, we looked at each other and shared a smirk! ;) That
was wonderful! I could see that she must have been a fun-loving person,
that attribute still exists within her. I then helped her finish the
dinner and I made sure I was asking questions and seeking response from
her. It is very encouraging to see such a positive response from her.
Before
I started volunteering at this hospice, I warned how emotionally
exhaustive this can be, especially when the patients you visit are not
showing a positive response. I must say that I was both nervous and
apprehensive on what kind of response I will receive. But, I’m lucky to
be getting such positive responses from the patients that I am visiting.
It hurts to see these patients at the end of their life. Most of them
have lived on to gain wonderful experiences and parts of their
personalities are still reflected in certain aspects of their behavior. I
feel rewarded to be able to interact with them and glean on their
experiences.
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